I’m not quite sure how this works,
all the worries fighting for my attention.
How do I overcome by achieving
what my brain refuses to believe is possible.
To walk on the blades edge of faith.
Everyone and myself are unsure,
yet all I know is my feet keep walking
and they do not fall.
I don’t think you would ever quite understand how the sky sends its rays of light down in this island
how the houses tower high and the trees paint the city colourful
the roads are wide and sun bleached
colours that are unique to a scorched land, tones that are only visible under these beams of light
at night my eyes stare at the opposite side of the galaxy to yours
and different city lights twinkle in the distance
the cut and paste skyline is made by a different inspiration
I never contemplated how it would feel to live here not just stay
How can I describe my home to you?
When you’ve never tasted the smog in the sweltering heat of summer,
its polluted fumes dancing in your lungs.
You have not known the hum of the city,
its bustling essence always there but never noticed,
a constant reminder of lives in motion.
You will never know what it’s like to have music flow through your veins like lifeblood,
a heritage so rich but undiscovered by the world,
the heartbeat of my city is a history lesson in music.
You don’t know what it’s like to have 8.63 million hearts colliding daily,
each story a testimony of love, joy and loneliness.
Summer of sixteen
we found each other.
Determined not let the grief overwhelm
and desperate to be older simply to sing the song.
As the hazy sun never faltered,
all I remember is your hammock
and the trees.
Consumed with thoughts of who we would be,
well thats not exactly true,
boys took up space too.
We were so fearless and bold.
We were wild and free, living our tangled lives.
All our darkness bleached clean in the joyful sunshine.
I can still taste our companionship,
living as best as we could
and revelling in the mystery.
Watching my sky alight
as my heart weighs heavy.
My thoughts rushing
crossing all the thoughts I used to have.
The past is here sitting beside me,
I am trying to lay it down
and leave it be.
Here I am, stepping into the unknown and putting myself out there. For months I have wanted to publish my writing and I’m now taking a leap into the unknown through sharing what I express in private. Moving to Sydney a month ago has pushed me to break the walls I placed on myself and take ownership of the opportunities that are available to me. I hope that my posts are able to help people who, like me, struggle to express emotion and through this I can document the journey I am embarking on.
How are we so quick to inflict shame?
A lightbeam graced in skin,
is now trodden down
to a list of wrongs
and a darkness she could never be.
It hurts to know
she thinks of herself
through a misted glass of shame,
when on the other side,
calling out for her to see
is her beauty
and her wonderfulness
if only she’d see.